Etiquette: Thank You Note Do and Don’t

Thank you note etiquette provides guidelines for showing appreciation to others for remembering you during those special events in our lives. Writing a thank you note has become the way of expressing sincere appreciation, which is in addition to a personal “thank you”. Doing both is the way to go.

Here are the etiquette guidelines:

A “thank you” note is always, always, always, hand-written. Never, never, never is pre-printed. Sending a pre-printed card only tells the receiver that he/she is not that important to you to bother to write something personalized. When you write your message you express warmth in your words, even if the note is brief.

Send thank you notes to every person who gives you a gift and to every person who organizes a party or a shower for you.

If someone gives you more than one gift, send one “thank you” note per gift. Don’t thank this person for all the gifts on one “thank you” note. Do it separately

Send “thank you” notes for shower gifts within 10 days of the party and for wedding gifts within 2 weeks after returning from the honeymoon. For gifts received in advance of the wedding, send the “thank you” notes immediately.

Do not forget to include your return address on your cards. This way your guests will have your current and correct address.

Write your notes with black or dark blue ink. They are easier to read.

When you write to your “thank you” notes, write more in “you” terms instead of “me” or “I” terms.

Remember, the showers and wedding are all about you, but the “thank you” notes are all about them, their love, and their generosity towards you. Keep this in mind every time you write a “thank you” note and you will always be correct and appropriate. They will feel happy thanks to your consideration of them.

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